His Love Is Her Memory
by BitterSweetlady
Summary: Izumi has lost her memory and Sesshomaru must help her get it back. will their love be able to survive another run through with all the evils of the past?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: As before this will be my only disclaimer for this story. I don't own any inuyasha anything nor do i own any of the songs used in htis story.

Chapter 1

" So you can't remember anything. Anything at all? " The man that I had come to know as Sesshomaru, who also said I was his mate, paced in front of the bed I sat on.

" That's correct. " I said. He stopped pacing and came to stand directly in front of me.

" Do you remember this? " He asked just before his lips descended on mine. His lips were soft and gentle against mine. His tongue gently slid along my bottom lip. I opened my mouth for him instinctively and gasped when his tongue brushed against mine. Just as suddenly as the kiss began, it ended. Sesshomaru left ,y lips parted and both of us gasping for breath. I touched the tips of my fingers to my swollen lips. I looked into his eyes. His brilliant golden eyes were smoldering.

" I remember that I like it. That I like the feeling. " I whispered to him. He seemed confused and stood still.

" I thought you could remember nothing. " His eyes turned icy and suspicious as he looked at me.

" That's right. " I replied. Sesshomaru took a step forward, hunching as if stalking prey. Sesshomaru truly looked like the predator he claimed to be.

" Then how can remember that if you say that you cannot recall anything? " He questioned.

" It's different. I can't remember…things, memories. But I can remember feelings and touches. I don't know how to explain it, but that's what happens. " I looked him in the eyes as I explained. He nodded his head in understanding. Which is kind of a contradiction because I didn't really make sense, even to myself.

" I…I'd like to know a little about myself. If that's alright. " I half asked him. Sesshomaru came and sat down beside me. The bed creaking under his weight. He took my small hand in one of his much larger ones and traced small circles with his thumb on my skin as he looked at me.

" What do you want to know? " He asked with a grin. Instinctively I knew he was playing with me and I smiled slightly.

" Tell me about us. About our life. " I whispered as I let my fingers run over the smooth skin of his hand.

" Okay, " , he paused, " You love me. And I know this because every time I touch you, no matter how small the touch. That being said, there is hardly a moment when I don't think of touching you. Your hair, your skin…your lips. " He finished his statement by leaning forward and placing a soft, chaste kiss to my lips.

" And you? " I asked. I know he knew what I was talking about, although he choose to pretend not to know.

" And do I what? " He asked, feigning confusion.

" Do you love me? " I wanted to know and I also knew that this was a sensitive subject. Love for him was. He looked away form me for a moment and I thought he wouldn't answer me. Then he turned to me and his eyes held a golden fire that I found I liked very much.

" Yes, I do love you. ", He whispered, " I don't say it enough and it's hard for me to show my emotions, but I do love you. Never doubt that, ever. " I nodded in understanding.

" Tell me more. " I asked. He nodded slightly and held my hand between both of his, looking at intently.

" We have three children. Rin, the eldest, is nine and our adoptive daughter. She is human. Micheko, our son and first born, is a full yukai and he is almost six. And finally our youngest daughter, Mayumi, is a full celestial and she is almost three. ", He paused, " I think it would be best if I took you away until you regain your memory. Rin would understand of course, but Micheko and Mayumi will not in their young age. " I nodded sadly. I wanted to meet my children, but I knew that he was right.

" Okay, when? " I asked softly.

" In the morning. Right now you need rest. We should…" He began and I cut him off.

" I do not need rest, My Lord. I am well rested. " I spoke to him. This was probably not the best of ideas, considering he had stood in front of me as he spoke and now leaned over me. His hands on either side of my waist, captivating me in the cage of his strong arms.

' You will rest mate. We will travel for two days before reaching the beach house. You will need your rest." His voice left no room for argument. As he spoke I moved back away from him. My heart started beating faster an I didn't understand this feeling that coursed through my body. I moved back further and he followed me. Before I realized it, I was on my back as Sesshomaru hovered over me.

He settled his body over mine and rested his head on my neck. My breathing was heavy and my heart beat wildly in my chest. The feeling became stronger…warmer and I felt him smirk against my neck.

" That's all you're going to tell me? " I asked. I wanted to know more about my children, about me…about us. Sesshomaru raised his head and looked at me. His eyes were on fire again. Like just after he kissed me.

" That's all you need to know right now. " He whispered. Sesshomaru lowered his head back to my neck. I felt his lips press against the sensitive skin and I sucked in a breath. I placed my hands on his shoulders at first to push him back a little. Sesshomaru nipped at a particularly sensitive spot on my neck and then my hands grasped his shoulders, my body arching into his. He was to far away from me. I knew this feeling. Knew that I'd felt it many times before. I heard the soft hitch in his breath and then the low, rumbling growl that rose from his chest.

" No. ", He whispered, " No, as much as I want to touch you after being denied of you for so long, I won't touch you as of yet. ", He paused and took breath, " Losing your memory has made you innocent again. I would wait until you regained some memory of us before I would touch you again. " I could hear the strain in his voice and see the blazing wild fires in his eyes. He was controlling himself.

" But, ", He whispered at my ear and I heard the husky deepness of his voice, " Rest assured woman, I will keep you on your toes, ", Sesshomaru paused, then a mischievous grin reached his lips, " or more precisely curling your toes. " Then I felt his hand slide down the length of my body and then stop to rest lightly on my hip. I confused at his intent until he gently squeezed my hip. I sucked in a breath and felt my cheeks blaze with my blush.

" You blush beautifully. ", He said softly as he brought his hand back up to brush gently across my cheek, " If I had my way, you would blush this way most of the time you were with me. " He smirked when my eyes widened at his meaning.

" You…henti. ", I said between gasps, " I have no idea how I ever took you. " He smirked widened marginally.

" I seem to recall hearing no complaints. " He whispered and nuzzled my cheek. My blush deepened and my eyes widened when I realized what he had taken my words as.

" You know that is not what I meant. " I told him darkly as my blush faded.

" I know. ", Sesshomaru said softly stroking my hair, " But to see you blush again…I would have said anything. " His hand now lay over my heart gently. The other wrapped around my waist. My legs bent and prated as he lay cradled between them. His full weight pressed down on me. His weight and large frame pinned me to the bed. His eyes suddenly seemed very far away and saddened. I placed a hand on one of his stripped cheeks. My thumb gently stroking one of his markings.

Sesshomaru closed his eyes tightly and turned his face into my palm. He kissed my hand and placed one of his larger hands over mine. I noticed something then. The clawed hands I knew to be deadly and yet were so very tender when they touched me, were trembling.

" Sesshomaru? ", I asked worried, " What's wrong? ", I wanted for him to answer, but he didn't, " Are you okay? " I asked again.

" Sessh? What happened? " I asked softly. I stroked his cheek. He looked at me. His eyes devoid of emotion.

" You should rest. You will need your strength. " His voice wasn't cold, but there was no trace of his earlier playfulness. He rose from me and pulled me to the top of the bed. Sesshomaru spooned my back against his chest. I lay there thinking about his reaction to my words. Something awful had happened. If only I could remember what. I lay there thinking this over until sleep finally came for me…again.

I lay there quietly. Awake long after she had fallen asleep. When I placed my hand over her heart and felt it beating strong and rhythmically beneath my hand, I remembered how I felt when I could not hear it's strong beat.

My own heart had constricted at the memory. I pulled Izumi closer and buried my nose in her hair. Filling my lungs with her sweet scent. My hold on her tightened when the realization that I had almost lost her finally sank in. it's ironic that it should finally hit me now, as I hold her small body in my arms.

I kissed her mark gently and heard her soft moan in her sleep. I had missed that sound while those bastards had kept me down there in the dungeons. All the time watching her, but never being allowed to smell her sweet scent, touch her smooth , silky skin, or kiss her soft lips.

Not for the first time since I had know this tiny slip of a woman, fear flooded my veins. I pulled her impossibly close to me and rested my head between her shoulder and neck. I feared that she would be taken from me again. Without her memory, her mind could easily be swayed. It was in that moment that I vowed that nothing would ever harm her again. I couldn't stand the fact that I was almost to late the lat time and I'd be damned before I let it happen again.

" You will get your memory back. " I whispered fiercely to her sleeping form before I too fell asleep next to her warm body.

I am back! Well I feel I should warn you, there will excessive amounts of fluff and lemony scented scenes through out this story. The ONLY two lemons will be at the very end. So for the delay, but I took on a challenge of my own demise. I am writing two fanfics as of now. I am half way through the first chapter of the other. If you wan to read it will be posted here and on a-single-spark. So anyway PLZ review! Sayonara! P.S title is Cruel Intentions.


	2. Chapter 2

I awoke surrounded by warmth. I peaked open my eyes and then threw them open, when I realized I lay on a hard chest. I let my eyes travel up to his face. I 'eeped' when I saw that he was looking at me. I sat up quickly and then blushed when I realized that I sat atop his hips, one leg on each side.

Sesshomaru chuckled softly and sat up. One hand running along my thigh to wrap around my waist. The other slid up my back and splayed out just past my shoulder blades. He pulled me to him. Kissing and nipping the soft, sensitive skin just behind my ear and below it.

" Woman, ", He whispered, " It's a bit late to be blushing now. " His breath was hot against my ear as he said this, but it wasn't the same as last night. He was too tense. I could feel it as I laid them on his shoulders and let them slide up his neck to cup his face.

" Tell me what happened? " I half asked him. His body went ridged against mine and his eyes became dark and cold. Sesshomaru's hands wrapped around my wrists' and removed my hands from his face. His hands' grasped my hips and lifted me from his lap and sat me aside. I watched him as he dressed. He didn't look at me once. His voice was cold and biting when he finally spoke.

" You will bathe, a servant will lay a kimono out for you, she will lead you to me and then we will leave. The children will already be at their guardians home by then. " His tone sent shivers of ice down my spine an when he looked at me, his eyes were, again, hallow. I remembered last night, when he looked like he had lost something. Again I wondered what it was he had lost.

" I will leave you now, My Lady. " he whispered, bowed, and left the room. I stared after him for a moment, then looked to the doors he had gestured to. I slowly got up and walked toward them. My hand slid gently along the smooth wood of the bamboo, before I slid the doors open.

Inside was a round tub of steaming water. The tub was set low into the floor and a bench lined the wall all the way around the room. A small basket set at the edge of the tub held bottles of different shapes and sizes. Turning I closed the doors and slipped the night shift quickly over my head. I sank down in the tub and let the warm water relax my tense body.

I reached over and picked a small purple bottle from the basket. I pulled out the cap and sniffed. The scent was Water Lilly. One of my favorites. I poured a small amount into the water and washed my skin and hair with the sweet smelling oil. Rising up out of the water, I reached for a towel laying on the bench. I wrapped the towel tightly around my body and stepped from the room.

I looked about the room and noticed a pile of fabric. Neatly folded on my vanity seat. I walked over and picked up a piece of white cloth. It was obvious what it was meant to cover, but it was very different from the ones I had recently discarded in the bathing room. The cloth hug low on my hips and just barely covered my backside and neither regions.( A/N: think of the very sexy panties you buy to ware for your man that just barely cover anything.) The strips of cloth that hugged my hips tightly were so tiny, I thought they might snap if I moved. Fortunately they held strong.

I picked up my breast binding and began winding it around my chest. Next I reached for the deep reddish-maroon colored fabric. I wrapped it around my waist and gasped when it didn't go all the way around. There was a small metal clasp at the end of each piece of fabric. I hooked the pieces together and the fabric resting, just above the cloth that covered my neither regions, at my hips. The front piece of fabric stopped just on the inside of my left leg and the back piece just on the outside of my left leg. A long slit in the skirt was the result. Reaching from the end of the fabric, at my ankles, to the beginning of it at my hips.

The last piece of fabric was the shirt. I slipped it over my arms and closed it. Fastening the little metal clips to keep it closed. The neckline stopped a third of the way up my neck and the sleeves stooped a fourth of the way from my shoulders. The shirt hugged my skin tightly and stopped just above my belly button. Leaving my whole midsection exposed. The shirt was like the skirt. Deep reddish-maroon fabric, lined at the hem and edges with dark, pale pink silk.

Sitting at my vanity, I brushed out my inky black, hip length hair and placed a small golden bracelet on my left wrist. I then, noticed the flat sandals at my feet. I put them on and they laced all the way up my leg to my knee, there they tied in a neat, little bow. No sooner had I finished, then a small women came to escort me to Sesshomaru.

She led me through many halls and arches. I decided to stop trying to remember how we got here and just followed her. Soon she came to an arch in the hall. The arch was the doorway to a beautiful garden. There in the garden stood Sesshomaru. He was speaking to a man with long brown hair and blue eyes. A two headed dragon stood on the other side of the garden. Grazing on the sweet grass beneath the Sakura trees.

The brown haired, blue eyed man looked from Sesshomaru to me. The man's eyes traveled up and down my body in long strokes. He nodded when our eyes met. Sesshomaru turned then. His eyes held annoyance and anger until they saw me. The servant that had brought me here had long sine gone. I saw the slight hitch in his chest as he looked at me, that would have gone unnoticed by any other.

His gaze made me blush, as his eyes slowly moved up my body. Stopping briefly in places. When his eyes met mine, they smoldered and clouded. He waved his hand and the man, still standing behind Sesshomaru, left the garden. Sesshomaru stepped forward and as soon as he came close enough, he pulled me to him.

When his hands touched my sides, my skin jumped. His lips crashed down on mine and his tongue forced it's way into my mouth. The kiss was passionate and hungry. I could do nothing, but kiss him back, my hands laying limply at my sides. Slowly, he broke the kiss.

" You look ravishing. " Sesshomaru whispered to me before he turned and whistled a very high pitched whistle. The two headed dragon approached us. I grasped Sesshomarus' arm tightly when the dragon nudged my shoulder with one of his massive heads.

" Ah-Un will not hurt you. Come. " He said softly. Sesshomaru grasped my waist and hoisted me up on to dragons' back. He sat me so one leg was on each side. Sesshomaru took the reigns and mounted the dragon behind me. Soon we were in the air heading further west.

Sesshomaru let the reigns rest on the saddle in front of me. On of his arms wrapped around my waist, while his other hand rested on my bared thigh. I leaned back against him. I felt like I'd never this happy before.

But plz review.


	3. Chapter 3

The first day was unbecoming. Sesshomaru didn't stop us once for rest and his hands remained where he had originally placed them. One on my waist, the other on my thigh. He didn't speak, even if I asked him something. He stopped us just after the sun went down.

Conveniently by a stream. After I bathed, I found that Sesshomaru had started a fire. I ate some bread and cheeses from Ah-Un's saddle bag and then I slept on the other side of the fire from Sesshomaru. Something was bothering him and I didn't want to make it worse. I slept dreamlessly that night.

The next day was exactly like the first. Everything done in silence. We reached the beach house about an hour before the sun set. The house was very large. Like a lower lords mansion. It was a brick-red color and faded. Like no one had been there in years. The garden was huge and a cobblestone walkway led down to the sandy beach. A small hill at the edge of the garden held a single Sakura tree and looked over the ocean. It was beautiful in it's simplicity.

Sesshomaru helped me off Ah-Un, who then wandered away to munch on some grass. I blushed up at him and felt him chuckle. I slowly moved from his arms and he let me go without complaint. I stood on the small hill overlooking the ocean. I wanted to fell the sand beneath my feet and the waves of the salty ocean against my skin. Hurriedly I unlaced the strapping's of my sandals from my legs and kicked them off my feet. I ran down the hill, a bubbles laugh coming from my lips as I went.

I slowed to a walk when I reached the white sandy beach. I walked slowly toward the ocean, the sand squishing under my feet and between my toes. When I reached the soft, wet sand that divided the beach from the ocean waters, I stood and let the gentle waves wash against my feet. I moved further into the water so that it covered my ankles and the hem of my skirt became sodden. I lifted it out of the water slightly and began twirling around in half circles as I hummed a familiar tune.

Then the memory hit me. I saw a man sitting in a chair at a table and a woman sitting side ways in his lap. She was singing. It was the same tune and I remembered the words and sang them with her as she sang. Until a small girl bounded up to the couple and the memory ended.

I stopped spinning and almost landed face first in the water with confusion. I looked around, I was no longer in the couples kitchen, but where I was before. On the beach, my toes buried in the sand as the water lapped at my feet. I began to sway as the tune cane back to me and I started to sing the words.

" You're a soul. Written by the hand of God. Don't bet me once, this might sound to you a bit odd. But you use the place, where all my thoughts go hiding! Right under your heart, is where I find them! " I paused for a moment and took a breath when I felt a strong pair of arms come around my waist and begin swaying and turning with me. I began again.

" Underneath your flaws, there's an endless story! There's the man I trust. There's my territory. And all the things I deserve for being such a good girl honey! Because of you, I forgot the smart way to write. Because of you, I am running out of reasons to cry! When our friends are gone, when the party's over! We will still belong to each other! " I paused again and turned to him and stepped away. Holding his hand a moment longer, making sure his eyes were on me. Then I dropped his hand and stepped further away. Dancing for him as I began the last part of the song.

" Underneath your flaws, there's an endless story! There's the man I trust! There's my territory! And all the things I deserve for being such a good girl! For being such a good girl honey! " I stopped dancing when I felt his arms around me again. I had ended the song on a soft note, just like my mother. I had realized the woman was my mother and the man was my father half way though the song.(A/N: I know that is not how the song goes, but I changed it. 1 because I couldn't remember all the words and 2 because I think the end of the song is not feudal Japan material.)

" What was that? " Sesshomaru asked me. I tilted my head to the side as he kissed it.

" It's the song my mother wrote for my father when they were mated. The women of my family write a song for their beloved when they are mated as a gift. ", I explained, " Did I write you one? " I felt him stiffen and them relax so suddenly I wasn't sure it had happened at all.

" No. You did not. " Sesshomaru replied.

" I wonder why not. " I mused as I pressed further into him, noticing the absence of his hard armor.

" Probably because our mating wasn't traditional. " He retorted. I felt my face pinch in confusion.

" What do you mean? " I asked. He shrugged his shoulders and shook his head.

" Never mind. ", He whispered, " Forget about it. " I agreed to forget for the moment, bit I would ask him about that comment later. I turned to him and gasped. Noticing for the first time the absence of his armor, but his obi, swords, hori, and boots as well. I took in his beauty as the sun faded and cast an ethereal glow around his body. My eyes followed the lean line of his body. Rising from his long legs to the contours of his muscular torso. Running over the span of his chest and shoulders, up his perfect neck to his lips and finally his eyes.

I blushed and turned away from him to watch the moon rise. I felt completely embarrassed. The little smirk on his lips said he had caught me staring. I heard him move and when he came into my line of vision, he stood next to me. Aloft, not touching me. His eyes looked at me and I tired to pretend I didn't notice, but my blush deepened and gave me away. His smirk widened.

" It's beautiful isn't? " I asked referring to the moon, that now cast her a luminescent glow upon the sea.

' It is. ' I heard him whisper. I looked at him strangely and blushed deeper when I saw he looked at me. He chuckled.

" I thought I had seen all the shades of blushes to pass over your cheeks, but I do believe that I have yet to see this color. " Sesshomaru spoke softly. Sesshomaru took a step toward me at the waters edge. I got a brilliant idea. As he took the last step towards me, I reached down as if to pick the hem of my skirt up out of the water. At the last second I swung my hand through the water and splashed him.

I looked at him as I straightened and I couldn't hold back the laugh that bubbled up inside me. No one would believe he looked as he did now and if anyone were to ask, he would deny it. He torso was soaked ad droplets of water dripped from his chin. But the thing that made me laugh the hardest was the unlucky bit of seaweed that had managed to land on the tip of his nose and his eyes looking at the offending piece of slimy weed. He looked almost cross-eyed. I laughed harder and began to back away as he came forward. His hand reached up to remove the weed from his person.

" You think that is amusing? ", he asked me dangerously, " We'll see how you like getting wet. " I tried to run, but he caught me around the waist and threw me over his shoulder. I kicked my legs and tried to push myself up, by bracing my hand against his back. It was no use as he walked deeper into the water. Suddenly, quicker than I could breath, Sesshomaru flipped me back over his shoulder and I landed in his arms. One arm wrapped around my back, the other cradling the underside of my knees.

" Now we shall see. " He said and then he smirked. I was going to protest when he suddenly dropped me into the water. I was only able to take a small breath before I hit the water. I came up gasping and spitting out the salty water. I turned looking for him and found him a few feet from me on the shore. I stomped toward him. My skirt clung to my legs and my shirt became unbearably tight.

I wiped the hair from my face and glared angrily at him. When I reached him, I punched him on the arm. I crossed my arms over my chest in anger.

" I didn't get you completely soaked! You didn't have to dump me in the water! " I yelled at him. When he only smirked, I pushed him in the chest with all my might. He must not have been paying attention, because the smirk faded. Replaced with a look of shock as he tumbled backwards. Sesshomaru grabbed my wrist, bringing me down with him.

Sesshomaru landed on his back in the sand and I landed sprawled out on his chest. I stayed there for a moment and then I heard his low growl. Quickly I pushed myself off his chest.

" I am sorry! I didn't mean to… " My words were cut off his lips crashed against mine in a bruising kiss. He rolled us and then I lay beneath him. My hands pinned to either side of my head as he kissed me. He released my hands when he began kissing my neck. My hands grasped his shoulders tightly, when I felt his legs gently part mine.

I gasped when I felt him. His need resting against my thigh. My breathing became pants as Sesshomaru kissed my neck. His hands ran the length of my body. My belly quivered when his hand brushed over it gently, softly. My legs squeezed his waist and I cried out when I felt him place a hand over my mound.

" Please. " I breathed. I didn't know what I was asking for, but I knew I wanted it. Knew I wanted him. At my breathless plea, his head snapped up and the cloud I saw in his eyes cleared. He stood up from me. Sesshomaru looked down at me and his expression was a mixture of different emotions. The most pronounced was anger and a hint of disgust. Reason being the sneer he wore on his face. I looked up at him confused. Had I done something wrong?

I blinked and he was gone. I stood up looking for him. I looked around the beach, turning in circles. Then I heard a loud crash and the sound of glass breaking. I turned toward the house, where the sound had come from. Maybe it was just an animal outside trying to get in the house or maybe a servant knocked something over? What ever it was, I hurriedly made my way up the cobblestone path to the house.

Sorry for the wait. . And maybe she will remember some good lemons? W. So I think a very small remembrance lemon is in order don't you? Sayonara!


	4. Chapter 4

As I reached the door, I gently pushed open the door. Poking my head inside, I looked around. It was dark and the only light came a hallway at the end of the kitchen. Quietly I walked around the wooden island and down the hall. The door at the end of the hall was cracked open. When I reached it, I pushed it the rest of the way open. The sight before my eyes startled me.

Sesshomaru stood staring down at his fist which was covered in blood. Little flecks of glass reflected the light from the candle and the window on the door to the sun room was adorned with a jagged hole and blood stains. I rushed to him and took his fist gently in my hands.

" Sesshomaru! What happened?! " I asked him. He wouldn't look at me.

" Here, ", I said, " let me take care of that. " I guided him to sit on a chair and hurriedly went for a bowl of water, tweezers, and some bandages. When I arrived back in the parlor, he remained where I had left him. Staring transfixed at his still bleeding hand. I unfolded part of the cloth and laid his fist on it. Gently I picked the little glass shards out of his fist with the tweezers. I dropped each shard into the water and they sunk to the bottom.

Ripping a bit of the cloth, I dipped it into the water and cleaned the cuts. I wrapped the remaining bandage around his hand deftly and tied it tight. I saw no point in putting salve on the cuts. They would be healed within the hour. Again the things that I knew instinctively to do befuddled me and I sat still knelt before him. I remained there pondering how the strangest of things come to me at exactly the right time.

I didn't notice when he moved the bowl of glass filled water off his lap and set it gently on the table. I felt his hands on my face and that second before he pulled us up and buried his nose in my neck, was when I noticed it's absence. Sesshomaru wrapped his arms tightly around me and I was crushed impossibly close to him.

" I almost lost you. " I heard him whisper. I put my hands on his chest and gently pushed him away.

" I am here now. Okay? Everything's fine. " I told him. He shook his head.

" I need to…to try to explain. ", Sesshomaru whispered, " I need you to understand why I won't…not until you ask. Not till I…not until I think you are ready. " he stumbled over his words.

" Okay. " I whispered softly. Slowly he lowed us to the floor. We sat side by side. Him never letting go of my hand.

" I ignored them. What they said about you being what you are. I didn't want to hear it. I loved you. As long as what they said never reached you ears, I would ignore them. ", Sesshomaru paused and looked at me, " I never thought they would actually make good on their threats. Even so, when I heard them whisper things that held some semblance of truth and when I saw the so called proof, I did some things that I regret to this day. I…when I saw the false proof they gave me, I…just…I lost it. I…" He couldn't go on and he bowed his head. I touched his arm and he swallowed heavily.

" It's okay. You can skip it. " I told him. I wasn't so sure I wanted to know what he had done, but I had a feeling that sooner or later I would know. Sesshomaru nodded and took a breath.

" After the first mistake I made you my mate. After the second I was just happy you could still trust me enough to come back to me. But then I was called away to war. Even though I hated the thought of you being at the mercy of my advisers, I couldn't refuse the call. And so I went. That was my last mistake and it almost coast me you. " Sesshomaru paused and cupped my cheek. Running his thumb over my bottom lip.

" We won of course, but the feeling of victory was short lived. The monks surrounded me and Hakim stepped from their mists. The poison h threw was made from my own poison in my claws. How he managed to obtain this, I will probably never know. The poison subdued me and they locked me in my own dungeons. They placed a mirror in my cell and I watched you every day. One day Hakim came into my cell. He told me…that…he told me that…that they were going to kill you. ", Sesshomaru whispered the last part, " I tried to get there before…but I wasn't able to. They used Umi against you and I almost lost you. I killed them all. But then you weren't fine. You were so pale…and all the blood around your body…I thought I was to late. You weren't breathing right and…I thought…I thought they had…" I put my fingers to his lips to silence him. He wasn't ready to tell me and I wasn't so sure I was ready to hear. I believe I have never seen him cry, but when I looked at him, I saw the tear stains on his cheeks. I ripped a piece of cloth from my now dry skirt and wiped at his tears as I spoke.

" You aren't ready to tell me. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to. When you are ready I will listen. " He nodded and took me hands in his and looked into my eyes.

"The reason why I can't…touch you, it's because without your memory…it's like you are innocent again. Which you practically are. I could tell you, you were a fairy and you'd believe me. It's not that I don't want you or that I can't be with you. Until I believe you are ready I won't go all the way with you. I love you, but I won't hurt you again. " Sesshomaru's small speech touched me.

" I understand. " I whispered and I took is hand to help him stand. Sesshomaru turned and led me down a log hall and turned left up a stair case. After we walked for what felt like forever we came to a door.

" Bathe. I will be here when you are done. " Sesshomaru instructed. I did as I was told and went inside. Undressing and slipping into the warm water, I washed the salty water, sand and grim that clung to me from my body. When I rose from the water it was chilly and I quickly dressed in the silky silver yukata laying on the stool.

Walking out the door, I saw that Sesshomaru was clean too and wore a silk white robe over his black hakamas. He robe was loosely tied and hung open down to his bellybutton. He took my hand and led me down more hallways. We finally stopped in front of a door. Opening it, Sesshomaru ushered me in. the entire room was made from cherry and mahogany wood.

The bed was low to the ground and the only furniture was two wardrobes, a small table and two chairs, and a vanity. I noticed a set of gilded glass doors on the far side of the room, next to the bed. Walking over to them I opened the doors. The night sky was clear and the full moon illuminated the dimly lit room.

I turned and ran into Sesshomaru's bare chest. His robe hung on the back of one of the chairs. He took my hand and led us to the bed. I sat down first and patted the space beside me.

" The room in beautiful. " I whispered.

" When my father built this house, he had this room specially designed for my mother. Unfortunately she died before it was completed. It's my gift to you. " Sesshomaru said softly. I felt the tears slide down my cheeks.

" Thank you, but I don't think I will be able to find it on my own. " I laughed. He smiled.

" You have me and Tain and Nina. " Sesshomaru said. I was confused.

" Tain and Nina? " I prompted.

" The servants. Tain takes care of the repairs. You will find him mostly in the woods or stables. Nina takes care of all the domestic necessities. She is usually around the house or in the garden. " Sesshomaru clarified.

" Oh. " I said. Oh that's all I could think of? Oh. Well that would have to do because I was suddenly tired. Sesshomaru laid us back down on the bed and pulled the covers up over us. We faced the moon and he spooned against my back.

" Sesshomaru? " I asked softly.

" Hn. " He answered.

" Can we go ridding tomorrow? " I asked.

" Do you even know how to ride a horse? " He asked skeptically.

" I don't know, but I was hoping you'd teach me how. " I whispered

" Fine we will find you a horse tomorrow and I will teach you to ride. " Sesshomaru murmured against my ear. I laid there thinking about the day. The way things have turned out. I let my fingers gently glide over the back of his hand as it lay on my belly. I felt him pull me closer and his breath was hot against my ear as he spoke.

" Even though your fidgeting is pleasing, I will ask you to stop. " He whispered. I stayed my hands.

" It's not fidgeting. " I whispered.

" Regardless, it is hard to fall asleep when you are continuously playing with my hands. " Sesshomaru said.

" But I like your hands. " I replied.

" As do they all. " Sesshomaru whispered. I was about to reply when his hand closed over my mouth and he chuckled.

" Sleep now, we will talk more in the morning. " Sesshomaru whispered tiredly. I kept my hands still and laid listening to his breathing for what felt like hours, staring at the moon. When I was sure he slept, I turned over as gently and as quietly as I could, so I could see him.

He looked so peaceful when he slept. Very relaxed. I gently stroked his cheek so as not to wake him and brushed my thumb over one of his markings. Sesshomaru purred in his sleep and I stifled a giggle. Luckily he did not wake. I laid there watching him sleep for a while longer. Before sleep finally claimed me, I moved closer to his warm body and draped my arm over his side, like his was mine, and I let my eyes fall closed.


	5. Chapter 5

Ch.5 First Memory

As I slept I had a strange dream. But I now believe that the dream was a part of my memory. At first it was just a random flashing of images or still moments. Thought I could recall exactly what happened. Then suddenly my memory slowed and I saw flashes of Sesshomaru and other people. I saw him save me from a group of men, fight with a brash boy, and then I stood in front of a camp.

I realized that I stood watching Sesshomaru pin me to a tree by my throat. The words came to me as I watched the scene play out.

'What are you?!'

'I'm a celestial-inu-miko.'

'I'm not dangerous.'(A/N: not going to recite the whole conversation here.)

I watched as he released me and I remembered what was said. Then a strange thing happened, I felt his hand on my skin. I watched as he touched my other self's neck and I was amazed when I felt it too. I felt the presence of his tongue on my neck as I watched the scene.

I felt every pass of his tongue over my other self's skin. And then as I watched him kiss my ( so to speak ) neck, I shuddered. Even though the me, pinned to the tree, stayed still. Then the scene changed. I caught a glimpse of Sesshomaru and myself by a hot spring and I knew a serious conversation was going on. I knew I would remember when I woke up. I vaguely caught a glimpse of Sesshomaru breaking a man's arm and myself gasping in pain on a large bed.

Something changed then, I watched through my own eyes as Sesshomaru came toward me. We were win in the library. His lips crashed against mine and I felt the shelves press into my back. He kissed me long and hard. His tongue dueling with mine. I felt myself lick his fangs. He growled and kissed me harder, and pushed me into the shelves farther. I did it again and he gentled the kiss and broke it. Then, finally, I woke up. I turned over with difficult. Due to an arm latched tightly onto my waist.

Lightly, I traced one of his markings on his cheek. Gently running my finger form tip to base and back again. Sesshomaru purred in his sleep and nuzzled my hand. I smiled and ran my finger over the shell of his pointed ear. I heard a growl that made a shiver run down my spine and goose flesh to rise on my skin. I turned to look at his face and saw that his eyes were open and watching me.

" Woman," his silky voice said, " you will stop your movements this instant. " His tone as low and dangerous, playful. And I suddenly felt like pestering him. If only for a moment. I went to run my fingers over the shell of his ear again, but he caught my wrist and brought my fingers to his mouth. Sesshomaru kissed each of my fingers before he gently kissed my palm.

" I think we should go and find you a horse now. " He whispered. I only nodded as he rose and held out his hand to me. He wore his usual attire. I pulled on a white broom-stick skirt, that hugged my waist and ended in a point just below my belly button. The shirt, also white, had three quarter sleeves that ended just after my elbows. The neck line was rounded and dipped low to show only a bit of cleavage. The shirt ended just above my belly button. Not appropriate attire for a lady, but it was only he and I here to really see it.

I turned and out of no where, Sesshomaru grabbed my hand. His other hand skimmed the skin of my belly and then he proceeded to lead me out side. Our walk was slow, as Sesshomaru led me out through the garden and toward a stable. The stables were average and they held four horses in each. All in all there were twelve horses and three stables.

We walked threw the first stable. There were two horses that I liked, but they weren't broken yet. The second stable held a horse that really scared. Of course it was Sesshomaru's horse. He informed me that the horse's name was Shinto. The horse was inky black, as were his eyes. The only other color on the horse, was on his hoofs. They were a creamy brown color.

I had touched his muzzle and he had nudged my hand, I smiled and rubbed his snout. I thought it a perfect match. Both he and Sesshomaru looked imposing and dangerous, but were really kind at heart. We moved to the last stable after Sesshomaru instructed that Shinto be saddled. The last stable held all the newly broken horses. Toward the end of the stable was a beautiful white mare. She was completely white except for the black colored hair in the shape of angle's wings on her forehead. I looked at her. Her eyes were a brilliant blue.

" I think we have a match. " Sesshomaru whispered at me ear. " What will you name her?" He asked. I looked at the black wings on her forehead and I knew what I'd name her.

" Tenshi. " I whispered. " Her name is Tenshi. " I heard Sesshomaru chuckle.

" I like it. " He said as he gestured for Tain to saddle Tenshi up. Sesshomaru lifted me up onto the saddle and helped me get situated. Placing my left leg in the stirrup, and my right over the pommel. Handing me the reins he went over and mounted Shinto in one swift fluid motion. He flicked Shinto's reins and the horse began walking. I followed suit and soon we were riding side by side.

Soon Shinto's was in a slow gallop flinging water at me as we rode along the shore. Soon I coxed Tenshi into a gallop and rode along side Sesshomaru, who smirked at me.

" I guess I know how to ride a horse. " I said breathlessly.

" That's all in good, but I don't think you want to go faster." He quipped.

" Why? " I asked

" She's a runner. She likes to run. " Sesshomaru said reaching over and patting Tenshi's neck.

" Well, " I said and smiled devilishly, " that makes two of us. " I flicked Tenshi's reins hard and dug my heels into her sides. Tenshi reared back and then took off. I would have to tell him later that he was right. Tenshi practically flew over the land as we rode up the coast and soft sand, for the grassy field that lay beyond the house property.

I turned back to see if Sesshomaru was following. Indeed he was. He was riding Shinto hard and gaining little ground. I slowed Tenshi to a stop and turned her around, so that I could watch him ride up. Sesshomaru caught up in no time and stopped Shinto in front of me.

" It seems, my dear, that I must get you a slower horse. " Sesshomaru said while smiling.

" I think not! " I said laughing. " I love this hose. " I smiled and patted Tenshi's neck. Sesshomaru looked at me, nodded, and smiled. I loved his smile. I wished he would smile more. I looked up, noticing it was getting darker in the grove. I turned Tenshi towards the shore.

" It's getting dark out. You think we should start back? " I asked.

" Not yet. " Sesshomaru said, dismounting. Shinto. He walked over to Tenshi and took her reins from me. Sesshomaru led Shinto and Tenshi to a tree and tied them off. Then he grabbed my waist and helped me down. " I want to show you something. " he whispered. Sesshomaru brought me close to his side and walked towards the middle of the meadow. By now the moon had begun to rise.

" Close you eyes. " He said softly. I closed my eyes and felt him lead me a few more steps. I heard a low whistle. " Open your eyes. " Sesshomaru whispered. I opened my eyes and gasped. The moon flowers had bloomed and slowly the fire flies were rising from the ground. I turned about. Taking in as much of the beauty as I could. I saw Sesshomaru standing a few feet away, smiling broadly.

" What is this place? " I asked him.

" It's a night garden. I helped Inuyasha's mother construct it while she was here briefly. ' Sesshomaru explained.

" Inuyasha's mother? " I questioned.

" My mother died and my father too a human mate in his grief. He grew to love her and they had a child. He was a hanyou. My father died saving her and Inuyasha. I kept her here as long as I could. Kept her hidden. But the humans found her eventually." Sesshomaru stopped to take a breath, " That was the only time Tentseiga didn't work for me. I kept my promise to her. I only fight with Inuyasha to keep him sharp. Ready for any thing. I hope one day that we can put this ignorant feud behind us. " He stopped then and took my hand, He kissed the back and held my palm to his cheek.

"Maybe. One day maybe. " I agreed. Sesshomaru nodded and kissed my wrist.

" We should go. It's late. " he whispered. He pulled me close to him, wrapped his arms around my body, burring his nose in my hair, Sesshomaru hugged me tightly. I wrapped my arms around his waist and hugged him back. We broke apart after a moment. He led me over to Tenshi and handed me up onto her saddle.. He untied her and handed me her reins. Walking over to Shinto, he untied the horse and mounted him.

We rode back along the beach slowly. Riding side by side, we were silent. Upon arriving back at the stables, we gave Shinto and Tenshi over to Tain and walked the length of the garden. I stopped under the sakura tree, that over looked the ocean. I felt his arms wrap around me and his chi rest on my shoulder. I leaned back into him.

"I love you. " I whispered. I wasn't sure if he'd heard me, but after a moment he whispered the same and led me back into the house. I slept in his arms that night, but I still had another dream.

For being away for so long. But family emergency dictated that I be away fro home and computer access for a long while. But I am back. This story is finished and I will be posting the rest of it's chapters as well as my new story. Forever was a lie. It is a sesshy X kags fanfics. So sayonara! P.S sorry about the spelling problem. As soon as I figure out how to spell the very confusing sword names, there will be no misspelling. If you know how to spell them PLZ send the spelling to me!


	6. Chapter 6

Ch.6 The second Memory

Like before I could feel what I saw. But it was different this time. The memories were just pictures flooding my mind and the emotions, the feelings just overwhelmed me. It felt like I was drowning. The memories started with me in a red yukata and Sesshomaru pressing me into the wall. Then they went through fast like flashing pictures. The last was of me clutching Sesshomaru's bloodied hori, while a man named Ginje held me. I remembered that I'd told my children that Sesshomaru was dead.

I sat bolt straight up in the bed. The cold sweat from my dream, drying on my body quickly in the hot air making me shiver. I felt a hand in my shoulder. I gasped and turned. I saw Sesshomaru and without hesitation, threw myself at him. Straddling his waist, I held him close to me. Running my fingers threw his hair, kissing his cheeks, neck, chest, and rubbing his shoulders. Little sobs and mewls escaped me. I couldn't stop them. The emotions, the sadness, despair and loneliness I felt were pouring out of me. It didn't help that I knew he was alive and here with me. The memory was so vivid.

"What's wrong? Izumi, what's wrong? "Sesshomaru asked softly.

"I remembered the day they told me that you…that you were…were dead!" I sobbed and clutched him closer. I felt him wrap his arms around me and he began rocking me gently.

"Shh, I'm here." he whispered to me, "its okay. " I wanted to believe him. That everything was okay. I couldn't' though. I didn't remember what happened after that day. And I had a sinking feeling that it wasn't good.

"No it won't!" I cried, "I can't remember anything after that! And I know it's not good! I'm scared Sesshomaru! I'm so scared!" I let my tears fall. I couldn't have stopped them, even if I had wanted to. Sesshomaru began shushing me and kissing my head. I suddenly felt alone. Even though he was right there, so very close to me. I felt like he was to far away. I kissed a path up his neck to his ear.

"Make love to me." I breathed and I felt him stiffen. He pushed me away and looked at me. He ran the backs of his fingers over my cheek, then gently over my lips. He rested his hand on the underside of my jaw and ran his thumb slowly over my bottom lip. "Please. ", I whispered, "Please." he nodded. I leaned forward to kiss him and he met me half way. Sesshomaru's lips were soft and gentle against mine. His tongue brushed my bottom lip and I opened my mouth for him. His tongue explored the inside of my mouth and my tongue dueled with his. The kiss began to be hungry and passionate, but neither of us broke it. I wrapped my arms around his neck and his hands slid up and down my side.

Finally, desperately needing air, I broke away and raised my arms above my head. Wasting no time, Sesshomaru grasped the ends of my night shift, which had conveniently been pushed up to my hips, and pulled it up and over my head. Tossing it to some unknown corner of the room. I gasped when he cupped a fleshy globe in his hand and ran his thumb over the hard, dusky tip. My hand covered his and I pressed it harder against my breast. Sesshomaru kissed his way up my neck to my ear. He kissed the hallo behind my ear.

"Are you sure?" he asked me.

"Yes." I whispered. My hands traveled down his chest (A/N: if you all don't know yet Sesshomaru always sleep with his shirt off. Kay? ) stopping at the waist band of his hakamas, my hands traveled back up his arms and settled on his shoulders, as he kissed his down my body, while laying me back on the bed. When he reached the juncture of my thighs, he nuzzled the underside of my belly. Quickly, Sesshomaru rose up and devastated himself of his hakamas and myself of my undergarments. Reclaiming his place between my legs, Sesshomaru kissed up the inside of my thigh, stopping at my womanhood. I sat up quickly when he placed a kiss upon it.

"What are you doing?!" I shrieked. Sesshomaru only placed a hand on my shoulder and pushed me back down on the bed.

"Relax," he whispered against my flesh, "you'll enjoy this." He sounded so sure. All hesitation was wiped from my mid when he touched me. Sesshomaru swept his tongue against the small nub nestled in my womanhood. I gasped and grabbed his hair. I felt him chuckle and the vibration made me moan. "I told you." Sesshomaru whispered. He did it again, but slower, deeper. I cried out and my legs moved to cradle his shoulders as he lapped at me. This felt so different from the other times I remembered before. I felt like I was on fire. Soon I felt the signs of my peak coming. When it finally came, it felt like an explosion. I threw my head back and a long moan escaped my throat.

When I opened my eyes, Sesshomaru had move above me. A smirk graced his lips as he looked down at me. I was about to say something when he kissed me. Then he thrust inside me and swallowed my moan, as his tongue brushed against mine and over my teeth. When he broke the kiss, we were both panting. When he moved inside me, the sensation was so very sweet that I cried out. My legs wrapped tightly around his waist and my nails dug into Sesshomaru's Shoulders as he moved. The pace was slow and gentle and I wouldn't have had it any other way.

He kissed me deeply and sped up the pace, lifting my legs higher up his back. I cried out his name as the deeper penetration heightened the already sensitive sensations I was feeling. I struggled to keep my legs lax as I felt my second peak approaching. I couldn't do it. My legs tightened around his waist and my nails raked down his back as I finally came. I heard him groan my name as he continued to move inside me. The sensations were warmer now, his movements increasing in force with each thrust inside my body. Even though the sensations were unbearably sweet, I didn't want him to stop. I needed him so very badly.

"Come for me one more time koi.' Sesshomaru whispered in my ear. I wrapped my arms around his back, holding him to me. I spread my thighs wider, but kept my legs locked around his waist giving him more access to my body. I felt him hit the wall of my womb and I cried out as he brushed against the spot again. I felt his member pulse inside me, as again he brushed that place and my walls fluttered around him.

"Don't stop!" I gasped as I came for the third time that night. This time though, I felt his member pulsate and his seed coated my womb. He froze shock still and I heard his low growl as we came down from this blissful nothingness. Sesshomaru kissed his mark on m shoulder and rose up to look at me. I brushed his bangs from his eyes and caressed his damp cheek. He smiled a shaky smile and I felt his body tremble. Vaguely I remembered a scene like this, him laying above me as he was now and trembling. He hadn't answered me then, but he would now.

"Are you okay?" I asked him softly. He nodded and rested his head fore head against mine. He was panting. His chest heaving and his heart beating fast under my palm.

"I've never felt this way about anyone before. And the emotions I feel when I am with you like this...they're overwhelming. I've never felt them before. I've never loved someone the way I do you." Sesshomaru whispered this to me. His eyes never leaving mine. His lip devoured mine. I opened my mouth for him and brought my arms up to wrap around his neck. The kiss became hungry as his hand ran the length of my body. From my knee to the underside of my breast and back again. Sesshomaru broke the kiss and laid his head on my chest.

The room was quiet and we laid silent lay silently for a few moments. His hands caressed my arms and I ran my fingers through his long, silvery hair. I thought about the way he'd said he loved me. I couldn't help, but think it sweet. A fluttering feeling started low in my belly and rose up to my chest, like butterflies.

"I love you." I whispered softly.

"I know. You said it often before…" He stopped and took a breath. I knew what was coming. "I tried to get to you. I tried so very hard and still I was too late. When you died in my arms, I…just…felt so…angry. I felt scared and sad and just…utterly helpless. I wanted to cry, to scream…to kill. I couldn't stand the thought of never seeing you again. I still can't. I still don't know what I did to deserve you." He explained. Sesshomaru stroked my cheek and I smiled.

"Sometimes it's the things we don't' do. Maybe that's what you did." I suggested.

"I think your right." Sesshomaru whispered softly. I smiled at him.

"Kiss me." I said. He smiled and kissed me softly, quickly on my lips, then rolled off me. Pulling the covers over us, he pulled me close and took my hands in his.

"I love you. So very much." Sesshomaru whispered.

"I love you just as much." I whispered back. I fell asleep listening to his soft, deep breathing. Snuggled down under the covers, I slept dreamlessly.

So. How did you like the first lemon? Hope it was good. You'll have to wait 'til next time to see if Izumi gets the rest of her memory back and who the special guest that may or may not posse a threat to our dear Izumi. So Sayonara! J


	7. Chapter 7

Ch.7 Days go by

Over the next few weeks I received no new memories. But all the memories between the first night in my room with Sesshomaru, 'till the day they told me he was dead, came back to me at odd times of the day. I remembered them with perfect clarity.

One day I was sitting on the porch with Sesshomaru across from me. He was reading a book and I watched the sea's wave's crash against the sandy shore. Then the memory just flashed before my eyes. I remembered seeing how angry he was. I remembered his hand coming back and then he standing over me. Rin crying and pleading with him. The memory ended when he walked out the door. I blinked my eyes a few times to clear my vision and realized that I was crying. Looking over to Sesshomaru, I saw that he was watching me intently. His book forgotten.

"You hit me?" I said quietly, not necessarily a question or a statement. I said it quietly as if I could make the bad memory go away. He hung his head guilty and rose, dropping his book into his chair, to kneel before me. He laid his head in my lap and his arms encircled my waist.

"I am sorry," he whispered softly, "I've been sorry for that for a long time."

"No need. I already forgave you." I told him gently. We sat there for a while and I played with his silver locks as the sun set. Making the sea look as if it were made of glittering emeralds rather than shinning water.

Another day, I was walking on the beach. It was during the sunset and I held the hem of my skirt out of the water. I had had a memory come back to me almost every day. My last memory was of Sesshomaru and I walking through the woods and then the embarrassing moment with Sango. I heard Sesshomaru call my name and I turned to look at him. Suddenly I was walking under the Sakura trees. I remember thinking that I only had so much time with him. I realized that I was remembering the day before he left me for the war. We stopped at the koi pond and I leaned back against him and he held me. The memory stopped then and I shook my head. Sesshomaru stood before me now and the confusion I could read in his eyes, quickly cleared when he saw my disoriented state.

"Another one?" He asked me. I nodded my head. Sesshomaru pulled me into his arms and laid his cheek on the top of my head. He was use to the torrent of emotions that followed my memories. But I knew that that wouldn't happen this time. I pulled away a looked into his eyes. I loved the color of his eyes. Liquid gold or hard amber depending on his mood. I ran my fingertips over his cheek. Sesshomaru nuzzled my hand and leaned toward me. Our lips touched and the kiss was sweet. His lips were soft and gentle as he kissed me. It was a true lover's kiss. One that didn't need passion or fire. Just a sweet, simple kiss.

The next weeks saw me as a worried woman. The memories, even though that's all they were, frightened me. I now had all my memories. Clear up until I opened the door. My dreams always consisted of just that. Walking down a hallway, with only a simple, plane white door at the end. I know what I will find be hind it. Even though I don't want to, I always seem to walk towards it.

My hand touches the handle and then I wake up. I know what is behind the door, but I don't want to remember. Even though I am scared and I don't want to open the door, I can't let my memory be incomplete. I had that dream again last night. Only it was different. I cracked the door open this time and I heard screams. I know I am getting close to the last bit of my memory. All I have to do is open a door. Sounds simple doesn't it? Who would believe that opening a door could be this hard?

I turned on my side to see him still sleeping. I dressed in a short blue top with gold paisley designs on it. The shirt stopped at my belly button, folded over and tied with a golden sash that hung to my knees. I pulled on a pair of black gaucho's and black slippers. Pulling my hair up into a high pony tail, I slipped out and shut the door quietly behind me.

I hurried down to the stables. Tain already had Tenshi ready for me. I had taken to riding out with her every morning. Tain handed me up. Instead of hooking my leg around the pommel, I unlaced it and handed it to Tain. I didn't feel like riding like a lady today. I just wanted to ride. I kicked Tenshi into a trot and then after a while into a run. I rode through the gardens and down the beach. When I finally stopped I could barely see the house.

I knew I should go back, but the sun wasn't even half way up in the sky. I turned Tenshi around and continued the way I was going. I crossed into a meadow and saw a figure step out from the shadows. I tried to slow Tenshi down, but I couldn't. She spooked and I was thrown backward to the ground. When my back connected with the ground the air was forced from my lungs and my vision darkened. I saw the door. I knew that this time I would open the door, but I wasn't so sure hat I was ready to open it. My hand closed over the knob and I opened the door.

I saw Hakim and then Umi. I watched otherworldly as she ran to me. A dagger strapped to her chest. I watched as the blood flowed from my wounds. I heard Sesshomaru's anguished cries as he held m body. My vision cleared and some one was standing over me. It was the man I saw the day we left the palace. The brown haired, blue eyed man. I knew him from some where else though. When he took my hand to help me up I remembered. I knew this man, this deceitful, ugly man.

"Tiosain?!" I cried, "What are you doing here?" I asked more calmly. His face was confused for only a second and then he studied my face more closely.

'Izumi?" He asked me, the confusion clearing from his face. I nodded. "I have been looking for you for years!" his voice sounded different. It rubbed the wrong way against my skin.

"You have?" I asked confused. I had now idea why he would be looking for me, but I had a feeling that it would posse a problem.

"I realized, albet late, that I had made a mistake." Tiosain said as he took a step forward, "I left a perfectly good woman who loved me, for a woman who was used and could never really love me. I guess what I am asking is…" I broke him off.

"Tiosain, you can't just come back after almost six years and expect me to still be standing there waiting for you." I said all this slowly and with emphasis.

"Can't I?" he asked dangerously.

"No! You can't!", my voice raising," I am married now. I belong to someone and I have three beautiful children. You have no place here."

"So your parents just sold you off to him then?" He asked

"No. I tried to save his ward and he ended up saving us. I was care taker of his charge and then things just clicked." I smiled fondly as I remembered the look on Rin's face when she found out that I was to be her new mother.

"I see nothing marking you as his." Tiosain whispered as he took a step toward me.

"I am his Tiosain. I have on objections to that. I love him." I told him. He began to say some thing, but we heard a horse ride up. I turned to see Sesshomaru riding Shinto. He stopped and dismounted in one quick movement.

"I thought I'd join you on your ride this morning, but it seems you still rise early than I." Sesshomaru was unusually happy this morning, not that I minded. He strode over and kissed my cheek and then brushed his fingers over the spot. I smiled at him and his little show of possessiveness. He took my hand and turned toward Tiosain. "Who's your friend?" Sesshomaru asked. His light tone gone.

''He's not my friend.", I said, "Matter of fact he was just leaving." I looked pointedly at Tiosain. Sesshomaru smiled then, But it wasn't a good smile. It was the smile he gave to people he didn't like. It also spelled death for those who didn't take it's warning.

"Well, that's good," Sesshomaru switched to whisper and leaned low to my ear, " because I have a surprise for you." I smiled and then nodded at Tiosain. He had a look of blankness across his face. Sesshomaru lifted me onto Tenshi's saddle and then mounted Shinto. " Good-Day to you sir." Sesshomaru said curtly. Sesshomaru kicked Shinto into a slow gallop, I followed. I took great, great comfort in the thought that I knew I would never see Tiosain again. We reached the Beach house and the sun was almost at it's peak in the sky. I could see three tiny bodies sitting against the Sakura tree on the hill.

'till next time peeps! Sayonara.

p.s next chapter is last lemon


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I don't own any inuyasha any thing, nor do I own this song amazing. It belongs to Janelle

Ch.8 Going Home

The children had come to see me o day. They were sleeping in one of the spare rooms. I lay next to Sesshomaru trying to sleep, but I couldn't. I had been working on something special for him and it was almost finished. I hoped that he'd like it. I finally gave up on going to sleep. I unwound my self from Sesshomaru and rose slowly out of the bed. Throwing a robe on over my slip, I padded barefoot out the door, down the hall and quickly out the back door. I walked through the garden. Gently brushing my fingers over the Roses, Lilies, and Moon Flowers.

The cool stones felt smooth and nice beneath my feet. The grass even better. I stopped beneath the ancient Sakura tree and laid my hand against the rough, but smooth bark of it's trunk. A small blossom came loose and I caught it in my hand, as the wind tried to carry it away. I played with it's smooth petals as I left the tree behind and walked along the soft, sandy beach. The waves beating lazily against the sandy shore and washing at my feet gently. I paced up and down the shore, humming, gently, the tune I had locked away until this time.

When I turned to walk in the other direction again, he was standing a few feet from me. The silver moonlight bathing him in a ethereal glow. His long, silver hair shimmering as it feel over his shoulder and down his body. I smiled warmly at him and stepped forward to take his hand.

" I was worried when I woke and you weren't there. ", Sesshomaru whispered, " Is something wrong? " I shook my head.

" No, I just couldn't sleep. ", I explained, " Having my whole memory back…it just…it's a lot to remember." He nodded and kissed my hand.

" I have something for you. ", I told him. "It's nothing much, but I've been working on it and I think it's okay. " A rare smile spread over his face. He pulled me in front of him and I leaned back against his chest and looked at the moon. I started to sing.( A/N: I won't write the whole song just the first and second verses.)

" The morning's cold and raining, dark before the dawn would come.

How long in twilight waiting longing for the rising sun?

Ooh, Ooh. You came like crashing thunder, breaking trough these walls of stone.

You came with wide eyed wonder into all this great unknown. Ooh, Ooh. "

I paused and took a breath, as Sesshomaru nuzzled my neck.

" Hush now don't you be afraid, I promise you I'll always stay,

I'll never be that far away, I'm right here with you.

You're so amazing, you shine like the stars, you're so amazing.

The beauty you are. You came blazing right into my heart.

You're so amazing . You are, you are. "

I stopped to breath again and then continued. Sesshomaru hugged me tighter and nipped at my neck.

" You came from heaven shining. Breath of God still flows from you.

The beating heart inside me crumbles at this one so new. Ooh, Ooh.

No matter where, how far you wonder ! For a thousand years or longer,

I will always be there for you! Right here with you. You're so amazing.

You shine like the stars. You're so amazing. The beauty you are.

You came blazing right into my heart. You're so amazing. You are, you are. "

I finished the song and turned to face him. Taking his arms and wrapping them around my waist. I laid my cheek against his chest. I heaved a sigh and nuzzled into his neck.

" so, do you like it? ' I asked. I raised my head a little to look at him.

" Yes, I liked it. " He said and kissed my cheek.

" I started writing it the day we arrived here. " I told him. Sesshomaru only nodded. I looked at the glassy water, shimmering in the moonlight. I closed my eyes as I felt him push my hair aside and kiss a path up and down the column of my neck. I stepped away from him and his ' distractions' .

" Won't you say something? " I asked him. Sesshomaru's fingers brushed over my cheek.

" Why? " He countered. I stared at him disbelievingly.

" Because I am trying to talk to you and you are practically ignoring everything I say." I explained in one breath.

" I am not ignoring you. There is just nothing to say. ", He paused, " It's not the best thing you've ever given me." He bent swiftly and began kissing his way up my jaw.

" What's the best thing I've given you? " I asked. Taking a quick guess. He was silent for a moment. His lips were soft against my skin and sent goose flesh to rise on my skin.

" You are. " He whispered to me softly, when he'd reached my ear. I tried to turn my head to speak, but what I was about to say was lost as his lips found mine. The kiss was gentle, smooth. His hands stroked my hair, face, neck, and body. I did the same to him. His hand moved slowly up my back. Sesshomaru abandoned my lips for my cheeks, jaw, and neck. I kissed his shoulders as he opened my robe. My breathing became a pant. Sesshomaru kissed my lips again. Hard this time, there was an urgency behind the kiss.

I gasped as he stroked my breast through the silk of my night shift. Sesshomaru took advantage and explored my mouth, swallowing my gasp. I felt his hands through the silk, but I wanted to feel his hands on my skin. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer as he kissed my. His hands traveled down to my hips slowly. His thumbs making little circles against my skin through the white silk. His hands slid lower over my naked thighs.

He lifted me and I held on to him. Breaking the kiss, I laid my head against his shoulder and closed my eyes. I hadn't felt him move, but suddenly I felt the ground beneath my back. Opening my eyes, I saw that we lay under the Sakura Tree. I slipped my arms out of my robe and wrapped them around Sesshomaru's neck. He kissed my neck and rubbed my legs. Pushing them up to cradle his waist as he laid between them.

I looked up and the moonlight streamed through the branches and cast everything in an ethereal glow. I felt Sesshomaru's hands slide up my legs and under my shift. They were met with bare hips. I saw his look of surprise as he realized that I was bare beneath my shift. The surprise quickly turned to lust. I felt him stiffen and then press against my heated flesh. Sesshomaru pulled the straps of my shift down, until he'd freed my breasts. He played with them and cupped them for a moment. Then a shot of hot desire flowed through my veins and pooled low in my belly. Sesshomaru sucked at my while I tried to get his hakamas down.

I Succeeded in getting them only half way down his thighs. He abandoned my breasts fro my lips. His hands moved beneath my. He laid most of his weight on me, a pleasant feeling, but held himself up on his elbows. I planted my feet on the ground as he entered me. I hissed and heard his gruntal growl as he dropped his head to my neck. Sesshomaru moved inside me and I grasped his sides with my hands. I buried my face in his shoulder to muffle the moans escaping my. Sesshomaru kissed my cheek and I slid my hands up to stroke his face. His body slid slowly over mine and each thrust jolted me. When our peaks finally came, neither of us made a sound. We laid there silently in our embrace. Our breathing returned to normal and he kissed me gently on the lips. A swift kiss and he lay his head on my chest. I played with his hair.

" So, are we going home then? " I asked softly. He chuckled.

" Yes, we're going home. " He replied.

" Good, ", I said, " I miss our bed. " And we laughed softly.


	9. Epilouge

Disclaimer" I don't won anything Inuyasha.

Epilogue: 500 years later…

I lay propped up in the bed, reading a book. Sesshomaru was laying the baby down in his crib. Inu, after Sesshomaru's father, was the fifth addition to a steadily growing family. Our only set twins, Yin for her beauty, and Yang, for his troublesome nature, Micheko, Mayumi, and Rin were already asleep. Thanks t a special potion, Rin never got any older than twenty-two. I heard the door open and close again. I dog-eared my page and set the book aside. Sesshomaru climbed up the bed and laid his head in my lap, locking his arms around my waist. He'd become much more playful, since the days of the Feudal Era had past.

Sometimes I feel like I have seven children to care for instead of only six. I ran my hand trough his silky hair.

" Is he sleeping? " I asked.

" Yes. " Sesshomaru sighed. He'd forgotten how tired a baby makes you. Luckily he was remembering. As for me, well there were four before him. I have much more stomach here than he dose. Sesshomaru sat up and kissed my cheek softly.

" Good night. " He whispered and rolled under the covers.

" Night. " I said. Turning off the side table lamp, I slid under the covers. I felt his arm around my waist pull me back against him. I smiled. Whether he was a Feudal Ear Demon Lord or a modern CEO, he still liked to cuddle. I placed my hand over his and fell asleep.

Okay so that is the end. at the end of every story i will tell you what the title of my next one is. so if you want to read it you don't have to hunt it down. So, Forever was a lie is next on my list and when ever I can I will post the first chapter. so Sayonara


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